by Dan Seitz
We associate car chases with thrills, spills, and last minute reversals leading up to spectacular crashes. But the reality is often kind of sad and boring: a short chase followed by a minor criminal being arrested and loads of car insurance bills.
But sometimes, the person being chased isn’t a criminal, and other times … well … other times they’re just weird.
#1) The Parade Was Yesterday?
A man in a purple cape is sitting in the driver’s side window, waving at passersby, and going at an extremely slow pace. Well, he has to; how can he wave, otherwise? The problem, of course, is that this is not exactly sanctioned behavior in a sedan tooling down a road in Los Angeles. But, at the same time, the man isn’t driving erratically and most anti-chase measure, like tire spikes, would probably seriously injure him.
Thus, the police were forced to drive slowly behind him, until he felt the need for some donuts and pulled over.
#2) Sometimes You Feel Like You’re Just Going In Circles
You might want to put your speakers on mute for this one, since whoever captured the video felt the need to get all cute and creative (i.e.: annoying) with the soundtrack. But we assure you that this video is 100% real, and we have a few answers to the questions you’re no doubt asking yourself.
Yes, that is a minivan. Yes, it is dragging police back and forth across about a mile’s worth of real estate. Yes, he is doing donuts, on the Interstate, and forcing the police to do donuts with him. No, we’re not sure whether or not alcohol was involved, although it wouldn’t surprise us. Yes, the driver was ultimately arrested.
#3) At Least He Wasn’t Speeding
Speaking of people who got a night in the pokey, Michael Stanley Merrick deserves a mention. Merrick did what nobody should do: he got behind the wheel drunk. How drunk? Drunk enough that he forced a police officer to follow him for nearly two miles, lights flashing and siren blaring, and not realizing it was for him. Oh, did we mention he never got above 32 miles per hour on this leisurely car chase? Or that he only stopped when he pulled into his driveway?
#4) When Is a Crazy Driver Not a Crazy Driver?
When it’s a medical emergency: this video, which just looks like an insane joyride by a teenager, is actually a 61-year-old woman in a diabetic coma. Fortunately, nobody was hurt and her car was stopped when it hit an embankment, but it’s still a reminder, if you see someone driving erratically: call the police!
#5) Well, That’s One Way to Deal With Speeders
Finally, there’s this car chase. Well, chase. When you’re using F-16 jets to chase a car across swampy land, like they did in the Netherlands, we think you can safely leave the “car” out of it.