Democrats and Republicans are at constant odds these days. We thought, in the spirit of friendly rivalry, that we’d take a look at who’s driving what, and how much it costs them in annual auto insurance. Which party has the pundits who really believe in saving money?
Car: 2005 GMC Yukon
Cost to Insure: Around $1,500 per year, although it might be lower as Beck’s car is older.
Fun Fact: Glenn Beck also owns a 2006 Cadillac Escalade. We’re less than surprised that Beck, who insists climate change is a myth and isn’t exactly a big believer in subtlety, drives two enormous cars. We’re just wondering how, precisely, he pays for all that gas, because man oh man, that can’t be cheap!
Car: A 2007 GM SUV, but apparently Hannity’s people aren’t big on talking about it.
Cost to Insure: Approximately $1,400 per year.
Fun Fact: Hannity doesn’t chat about his car much. That’s because Hannity blasted GM for taking the government bailout, and has been referring to it as Government Motors. We kind of feel bad for Hannity: he bought his car before the bailout, and now has his choice of socialist cars or Japanese cars. But on the other hand, considering the complicated dynamics involved in finding out where, exactly, your car was made, maybe Hannity had a problem from the beginning.
Car: 2007 Chevrolet Tahoe FlexFuel
Cost to Insure: $1,389 for the basic Tahoe, although the FlexFuel system might raise the cost a little.
Fun Fact: Huckabee is the only pundit we’re featuring on this list who is currently running for office. As such, he has the most environmentally friendly car…with a twist. The FlexFuel is designed to accept both normal gasoline, as well as any fuel up to 85% ethanol. As a total coincidence, Iowa, one of the major states for political caucuses, just so happens to turn out a lot of ethanol. Now that’s diplomacy!
Why, you ask, is Keith Olbermann not on this list? Easy: he injured himself in 1980 and as a result has no depth perception. He can’t legally drive.
Car: 2009 Toyota Prius
Cost to Insure: $1,300 per year
Fun Fact: Some may say Rachel Maddow drives a Prius because she’s a tree-hugging hippie (or at least has an image as one to maintain), but it might be because she wants a deal on her taxes. In addition to a federal tax credit on all hybrids, her home state of Massachusetts offers a good tax deal on hybrid vehicles as well. So she may be acting green, but is also saving a lot of green.
Car: Unspecified 2004 Chrysler
Cost: Approximately $1,200 per year, at least before he had to take it in for servicing a bunch of times.
Fun Fact: Michael Moore wouldn’t talk about which car he drives specifically, probably because he’s worried about somebody on the other side slashing his tires, but one thing he did mention was that his car needs a lot of repairs. As in, a lot of repairs. Maybe they’d get better press out of him if he didn’t have to take his Chrysler in quite so often? Either that or find his mechanic at the dealership, fire him, and put your best man on the job. Then we’d see “Hey, The Car Companies Aren’t So Bad” in theaters around 2013.
Car: Lexus RX400h
Cost to Insure: $1,500 per year
Fun Fact: You may read around the Internet that Al Gore drives some sort of fuel-guzzling monster, but actually, that’s the car he’s driven around in by the venues he visits to speak. Al Gore may have the Nobel Prize and an Oscar, but he’s not a rock star, so he takes the car people send to pick him up, regardless of how bad it is. Anyway, he’s required to have protection as a former Vice President. Priuses have a lot to recommend them, but somehow we doubt armoring them to federal qualifications (which include five-inch thick armor and a fuel tank immune to explosions) does much for their fuel efficiency.
We’re calling this one a dead heat. All three Republicans drive SUVs, and that hurt them in the totals: $4,000 versus $4,289. Of course, it’s worth remembering that any car has a variety of different factors when totaling insurance: one lousy driving record on either side could mean victory, and the Democratic taste for hybrids means their premiums might rise as those expensive systems break. Add to that all these pundits being a bit tight-lipped about their personal vehicles, for obvious reasons, and that throws off our estimates too. So really, there’s no way to call it.
But on the bright side, they’re all choosing good cars anyone can find. Well, not Al Gore, but certainly the rest. That’s a victory we can all agree on, regardless of political affiliation.